Joe No Show

It really tickled me! Frank can be an amusing guy. I was sitting with my hubby and Frank in an American Legion in Illinois enjoying a cool summer drink and watching kayaks and canoes drift by on the Kankakee River. Frank nodded his head at the remaining chair and said, “That’s Joe No Show.”  I thought he was kidding so I looked over at the chair and said, “Hello, Joe No Show.”  He shook his head at me solemnly.  “No, I mean it. Joe and I were supposed to get together at 8:30 this morning. He finally showed up about 11:00. I’m just thankful we did get our project done,” he explained, “but I had waited for him all that time. Then, he left again and said that he’d be back in a few minutes. That was over an hour ago. He may come back and he may not. We call him ‘Joe No Show’ because you never know when or if he’s coming for sure, nor when or if he’ll come back.” Lonny and I both laughed, although I’m not sure why, as we looked over at the empty chair.

Joe did show up shortly after that.  He seemed like a decent enough guy and when one of the waitresses asked him to help her move something heavy he got up to help her without a qualm. Yet as Lonny and I ate a delicious side salad before sharing an Italian Beef sandwich, I started thinking seriously about ‘Joe No Show.’ and looked over at Frank and said, “Frank, there is a story in what you told me and I think I’ll write it.”

Do you have a ‘Joe No Show’ in your life?   Whether it’s a man or woman, it can be so frustrating. I have a granddaughter who had a ‘Joe No Show’ in her life. Her “No Show” was a girl so maybe we should shorten it to ‘Jo No Show’ instead of JoE. This girl was friendly, gregarious and always ready to make plans. However, there were countless times she’d show up very late or not at all.  Many excuses were made and some very flimsy, like I decided to do something else. She didn’t call or cancel just felt it quite all right to do something else. I have six granddaughters and this one is probably the most forgiving, so she would let it slide.  When they did get together they would have tons of fun and got along so well that it was easy, for a while, to overlook the slight. However, it did not stop and eventually she knew she had to stand her ground. That conversation ended on a friendly note as they decided to remain friends but with the understanding that they would no longer make plans to do things together but each would go on with their own lives and make their time investment in other people. How sad! 

You do not have to be a Bible scholar to appreciate what we call the Golden Rule which was adapted from Jesus’ Sermon on the Mount. We popularly phrase it, “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.”  Seriously? I can’t think of anyone who’d relish someone not showing up, not calling to give them a status, or always coming so late plans have to be altered.  So why do they do it to someone else?  It hurts to be disregarded as though you do not count and as though your hopes for an enjoyable and productive day meant nothing and could be smashed. If you want loving and healthy relationships then treat other people with the concern and kindness you would like them to show toward you. In the case of my granddaughter she did forgive her friend but was unwilling to be subject to the same treatment over and over.  There is nothing wrong with that; we have a right to be honest with them and move on. 

Years ago I totally forgot a luncheon date with a ‘forever’ friend. Ironically her name is Jo but she’s not the one that didn’t show. It was one of the most embarrassing moments of my life. I felt terrible about it and realized I had seriously broken the Golden Rule.  I knew I would have felt awful if she had forgotten me. You are not supposed to forget a ‘forever’ friend. Thankfully she forgave me and we are still best friends to this day.  I’m telling you this because I’m human, and humans are not perfect.  However, we should strive for perfection in our relationships.  Being kind, considerate and keeping our word to those we befriend shouldn’t be that difficult.

As far as Joe is concerned, I think almost everyone has come to accept him for the way he is and that speaks very well for his friends and their level of understanding. I only met Joe once and he does seem to have a good heart and as the theme of one of my blogs stated, “Never judge a man until you have walked a mile in his moccasins.”

Yet no matter how many ways you flip the coin; kindness, consideration, and trustworthiness are the backbone of great friendships and these qualities serve us well in our daily intercourse with people in all areas of life.  It isn’t a question of what others do, but of what we do. That is what counts.

THOUGHTS FOR THIS BLOG

An acre of performance is worth a whole world of promise. ~William Dean Howells
 
Never esteem anything as an advantage to you that will make you break your word or lose your self-respect. ~Marcus Aurelius

I never had a policy; I have just tried to do my very best each and every day. ~Abraham Lincoln

SCRIPTURE READING

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, Galatians 5:22

Dear friends,
if you enjoyed reading this blog half as much as I enjoyed writing it, we are both winners.  God bless you until next time.